No, it’s not a new language, it’s a new mindset.
I’ve been reading a lot about FOMO (fear of missing out) and how thought leaders are asking us to consider the JOMO (Joy of missing out). Inevitably this shift in mindset should decrease your anxiety and create space for you not to feel overwhelmed and out of control. Can a change of mindset do all that? Let’s dive in ….
Did you know that the average teenager spends around 6 hours a day and the average adult 4 hours a day refreshing their social media feeds? That’s 37% of teens and 25% of adults waking hours being spent on social media. This obsession has led to a slew of health issues.
FOMO comes from unhappiness. Getting caught in the FOMO cycle shows low levels of satisfaction. Hence you ramp up your social media usage to make yourself feel better, and yet research shows that it actually makes you feel worse. To make things even worse, it’s an addiction that’s hard to break, and the tech companies know this. Not dissimilar to the smoking manufacturers.
Consider this …by turning your FOMO into JOMO you disconnect, you opt out and you’re actually O.K. just “being.” It’s about being present. It’s trying to find some kind of balance and setting boundaries.
So now what? What can you do to turn your FOMO to JOMO?
Here are a few things to consider:
- Acknowledge; “Do I have a problem?” Yep. I can see a 12-step program in the future (if it hasn’t been created already) on technology addiction. The first step is to take responsibility for your actions. So how do you know that you have an addiction? Let’s see; 1. You feel the need to use your smartphone more and more often – you’ve tried to decrease your use and yet your attempts have failed. 2. You have a preoccupation with your smartphone; constantly on social media/apps. 3. Excessive use where you have a loss sense of time. 4. Your relationships and work have suffered due to excessive use.
- Unplug. Don’t think of JOMO as a detox, but more like a healthy addition to your lifestyle. If you find that your smartphone is ruling you, try and keep track of your digital habits. There are apps that can help you do this. Some apps include: Social Fever, My Addictiometer, Quality Time, Space, AppUsage, App Detox, and OffTime
- Say “No.” Some of us have a hard time saying “no.” Exercise your right to say “no.” Think of it this way; the more you say no to things that you really don’t want to engage in, the MORE you can say “YES” to what really excites you. As well, begin to cultivate the expectation that you may not respond immediately to text and email messages. You don’t have to be Quick Draw McGraw. Healthy boundaries are a good thing.
- Om. Be in the moment. There’s nothing more satisfying than being mindful of what you’re doing in the present. You may have heard this before, and yet it’s worth repeating; “The past is gone, the future is unknown, but what we do have is the present – and the present is a gift.”
- Ignore Everybody. Embrace JOMO. Don’t feel guilty. By nurturing your creativity you’ll start to move into a state of flow, where you’re not anxious or bored, you’re following your bliss. This occurs when you’re in the right state of mind. When you’re away from devices you’ll find yourself thinking and doing more.
In shifting your mindset from the FOMO to JOMO you will, over time, start to feel a sense of ease. You’ll be able to breathe more freely again. It’s not a coincidence that digital detox holidays and no social media wellness retreats are on the rise. There’s a reason for that. People are finding that it’s just too tough to go it alone. And yet, I promise you, if you take back control of your life and shift your mindset to the JOMO, you’ll find your joy.